An open letter to my bench players.

Dear bench players,

I put you on the bench because I figured you were going to suck. Alternately I put the players in the game in play because I thought they would do well. Please don't fuck this up for me. I feel like there's something magical about the bench that instills in you great power and prowess, and that even if you had a major spinal injury and I put you on the bench you would score seventy touch downs.

Please, for the sake of my ego, suck when I put you on the bench.

Sincerely,

Dru